celebrate: to mark (something, such as an anniversary) by festivities or other deviations from routine

About a month ago my six daughters and I went to a wedding shower celebrating the marriage of the children of some dear friends.  I have watched these young people grow from children and now into young adults ready to commit their life and love to each other as they embark on one of life’s most sacred journeys: marriage. A few weeks ago was my own wedding anniversary. Jon and I celebrated 19 years of marriage. Over the past few weeks, I have thought a lot about love, marriage, and commitment.  When you are in the dawn of adulthood and your eyes are looking sweetly at your betrothed thinking of all the hopes and plans and dreams, it is intoxicating. It is easy to get caught up in the emotion of it all and forget that love is not a fleeting emotion. It is not a passing feeling; but rather, a choice. It is a choice you must make daily. Marriage is a commitment that you make once on your wedding day and then continue to make daily as well.  Every day, you must commit again to love, honor and cherish the one you have covenanted with before God. Many days this has been an easy task for me.  Jon is a gentle, godly, loving man full of integrity.  He is hard-working and has led our family well over the years.  He has always been very kind and attentive to my wants and needs.  Hardly an occasion in our life has passed when he did not come home with flowers or some other token of his love and care for me. I have felt like a treasured jewel for all these years. Then, there are the hard days! There are those baby and toddler days when you are giving all you can give just to keep the kids fed and clean. There are those school years when all your energy is focused on training these young souls to love God and become productive citizens.  Now, for us, have come the days of sickness.  It has been hard to see my beloved so weak from the chemotherapy that he can not even lift his head out of bed or take a bite to eat.  As I’ve spied him curled up in the hospital bed in the corner of our room, it stirs me with compassion for him. I wish I could take this burden from him. I wish I could love it away and make it better in the way I would kiss my child’s ‘boo boo’ and put on a band-aid.  The reality is that I just can not do that. What I can do; however, is love him THROUGH it!  I can cover him with a blanket, fill his medicine box, cut his hair, cook him dinner (when he can eat), care for our children, clean our house, wash the clothes, and on and on. There are a million ways to express genuine love.  Love that is patient as I wait for him to form his thoughts and words that seem to fly away so quickly for him these days. Love that is kind as I help care for him. Love that is forbearing as we walk this difficult journey. Love that remembers the love Christ has shown to us.  For Christ is the ultimate example of love. He is patient and kind. He bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. In Christ, we find our hope and our peace.  This hope and peace are sure and steady no matter the current circumstances of life. I can say with the prophet Habakkuk:

Though the fig tree should not blossom

And there be no fruit on the vines,

[Though] the yield of the olive should fail

And the fields produce no food,

Though the flock should be cut off from the fold

And there be no cattle in the stalls,

Yet I will exult in the LORD,

I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.

The Lord GOD is my strength,

And He has made my feet like hinds’ [feet,]

And makes me walk on my high places.

– Habakkuk 3:17 – 19

We celebrated our day in a simple way.  We commemorated it with our lives.  We enjoyed the quiet time alone as I drove him to his vitamin infusion treatment. We had a nice lunch together, just the two of us. It was a blessing that Jon even had the appetite to eat. 

There have been many years that we have celebrated our anniversary with an overnight trip, alone, away from the kids and cares of home.  These have been refreshing times in the past.  This year, we embarked on a different kind of journey. It was just as refreshing and memorable. There were not a lot of festivities, but there was definitely a deviation from routine.  Our entire family went on a 10-day trip.

It began with a stay in Huntsville, AL.  Our older five children competed in their final NCFCA Speech and Debate Qualifier Tournament of the season.  I can not say enough about the benefits of NCFCA.  There is NOTHING in our homeschooling journey that has brought so much fruit to our children’s lives in so many areas. Through NCFCA, they have grown educationally, spiritually, emotionally, and practically.  The community that they and I have built through this organization has been invaluable to them over these past 6 months of trials. This tournament turned out to be one of their best yet! Several of them placed in the top ranks of both speech and debate. One of them advanced for the first time ever. So, now, four of them are heading to the Regional Championship at the end of this month. During the tournament, we had a chance to spend some time with Jon’s cousin, who also helped with transportation for Jon and the younger kids while we were in Huntsville. She also did lots of judging at the tournament.  Thank you, Kami!  The day before the tournament, we even went on a hike with some NCFCA friends in the Monte Sano Nature Preserve within the Land Trust of North Alabama.  We may have gotten lost on the trail….in the rain. Copious good memories were made! 

After the tournament, we spent a few more days in the area. We really wanted to make some memories. We stayed with some dear friends who live in Tennessee. While we were there, we had the opportunity to visit Jon’s mom, sister, and her family. This was an important visit and especially good for everyone to see Jon’s mom and for her to see us! It is difficult to be so far away from family. It was such a balm to our souls to visit with them, even for the short time that we had together.

While we were there, we have a few adventures. Our whole family toured an underground cavern. Also, our friends took us to Dollywood. This was such a fun experience, especially for the kids. All the big kids rode roller coasters while I went on the kiddie rides with the littles, and Jon watched all the music shows. I’m so thankful that we were able to share this vivacious experience with our family and special friends. Overall, it was a wonderful trip full of laughs, family fun, and many precious memories. I am convinced that it was the most appropriate way to celebrate our anniversary.

As we returned from the intoxicating adventure of this trip we were hit full force with the reality of our current situation. Jon had an MRI and an appointment with his neuro-oncologist two days after we returned home. We were faced with a mélange of results. His scan rendered good news! There have been no significant changes since his last scan in early March. This indeed is a positive outcome. None of the areas that we are watching in his brain have grown since the last scan in February and the area around the resection (where they took out the tumor) has actually improved a small amount. However, his bloodwork came back with low blood counts all around, especially in his platelets and white blood counts. Over the past three weeks, the doctor has been monitoring him closely with blood work twice a week to check his counts. The platelets have slowly come back up to almost normal. However, his white blood counts have not come up. As a result, he had to get a shot to help stimulate his body to produce blood cells. The most common side effect of this medicine is excruciating bone pain. Jon has suffered from this for several days. In addition, we kept him home to protect him from possible sickness. At the end of last week, he went to get more bloodwork. His numbers are beginning to trend up again! This means the shot had its desired effect. He will have to continue to check his bloodwork. Hopefully, he will be able to start the chemotherapy again. This is an area where we would greatly appreciate your prayers! All of these difficulties are not completely unexpected for his condition. Regardless, they are trying.

When we are faced with trials and unexpected difficulties, we always have a choice to make. We could wallow in the overwhelmingly sorrowful circumstances as if we had no hope. However, Christ did not give this example to us! When He faced persecution and trouble, He did not turn away from it; but rather, he endured it with grace and mercy. He had mercy for those who hurt and blasphemed Him. As we have had to deal with a lot of details related to insurance, disability, taxes, work, etc. I have been tempted to fall into this pit. I want to say this does not make sense, or this just isn’t fair, but this thinking really is the opposite of what Christ demonstrated. So, I am learning to rely on Christ, to trust His Word and His ways even when I can’t trace His hand. I’m learning to press on despite the trials. I am reminded over and over that we are called to count these afflictions as JOY!

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,
knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.
And let endurance have [its] perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

-James 1: 2 – 4

When we think of celebrating, joyous occasions often come to mind like a birthday, anniversary, or graduation. Do you think of trials as joy? Can you see a trial or tribulation as something to celebrate because the Lord has placed it in your life to test your faith and produce endurance? This is what we are called to do! I pray the Lord will give me this joy as I walk through these trials. It really is only by His power and in His Spirit that we are able to consider it all joy!