grateful: adj. warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful

I thank my God in all my remembrance of you -Philippians 1:3

As I recollect the past four months I am unceasingly reminded of the graciousness of God displayed through His people. Again and again our heavenly father’s kindness to us was visibly and tangibly shown through the daily actions of His people. Friends, family, neighbors and even casual acquaintances from all areas of our lives stepped in to show love and support for us. It was quite overwhelming!

There were kind friends who hauled my children to all the places they needed to be while we were at the hospital before Anna was able to get her driver’s license. These men and women poured into the lives of my children and provided needed stability when the whole of our lives was only instability.

There was a handful of trusted friends who helped me deal with all of the paperwork and many details surrounding the accident, Jon’s medical care and a myriad of personal business issues.

GOD IS FAITHFUL!

There was a four month long meal train which provided meals at a time when I wasn’t even sure I could eat on a daily basis much less actually have the time and energy to cook. In fact, we are still receiving weekly offers of meals! God is so good!

There were friends who would show up at the hospital with a meal for me. They seemed to arrive at just the time I needed to see a familiar face. They listened as I enumerated my fears, sadness and weariness to them. Sometimes, they just sat and listened. Often they brought cheerfulness and laughter, which is the best medicine. Other times, they gave timely, sage advice. Many shared comforting scriptures that became my lifeline.

GOD CARES FOR US BETTER THAN THE SPARROWS!

There were endless cards, letters, text messages, notes of encouragement, and even posters written to bolster our spirits and share relevant verses during the darkest days. There are a couple of close friends who even stole me away for lunch or other special treats just to encourage me and provide a respite for me from the worries of the day.

GOD IS NEAR TO THE BROKENHEARTED!

There were monetary gifts from various unexpected places. For about a month, the mailbox overflowed with gifts for us. Packages arrived out of the blue, friends from all over the country and locally rallied together to fill the gap for us. These palpable, practical offerings are continuing to sustain us even now.

GOD PROVIDED EXCEEDINGLY ABUNDANTLY!

Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. -1 Thessalonians 5:16 – 18

It is so easy to be grateful in the simple, bountiful, painless, uncomplicated times. It is another thing entirely to be grateful in the difficult, lean, painful, complicated times. Yet, our Lord commands us in His word to give thanks in everything! What really sticks out to me in this verse is not just the ‘give thanks’ portion; but also, the other commands given here. We are told to ‘rejoice always’ and ‘pray without ceasing’ as well. If we rejoice always and pray without ceasing it will certainly empower us to give thanks in every circumstance! One enduring truth which the Lord has constantly recalled to me during this time is that giving thanks for all things truly is an anodyne for the suffering that comes our way. When we can see in every circumstance that there is something for which to be thankful, we see purpose even in the most tragic of situations. This does not mean that I am not sad and do not lament and mourn. It simply means that in my anguish I can look to the King of all the earth and see that He has ordained this path for me and my family and rest in the knowledge that He will sustain us. That is a very good reason to be thankful!

All of this grand thinking was put to test in my heart as we received the results from Jon’s latest MRI. It was a bit of a mixed bag. There was no new growth in the area of the resection (the place where they removed his tumor). This was very good news. There was also no new growth in the non-enhancing area that was shown on the previous MRI. This was an area that had been described to us as good brain cells mixed with cancer cells. It seems the treatments he underwent in November and December at least held the cancer at bay in these areas. However, there is a new tumor growing in the left occipital lobe about midline of the brain. This area of the brain controls vision, color, and visual field manipulation among other things. As of now, the tumor is asymptomatic, meaning that the doctor could not detect any effects of the tumor on Jon. He can see colors well, he still has good movement of his limbs, and he seems to have his peripheral field of vision. There are two schools of thought with regard to when this tumor developed. One thought is that it developed in the 5 weeks between the craniotomy and when he began radiation. This would mean that it grew before the radiation and chemotherapy started and perhaps the treatments attenuated the growth of the new tumor. This tumor is in the radiation treatment field, but not in the area in which they did the most intense radiation. The other possibility is that it grew even through the treatments. There is really no way for us to know exactly what happened.

So, what’s next? He will continue his chemotherapy treatments. He takes the chemotherapy pills for 5 days in a row and then takes 21 days off. This is about a 4 month cycle. So far, his body seems to tolerate this drug well. The side effects seem to have been mild. He is also taking weekly infusions of high dose vitamin C and other vitamins that help his body stay strong and enable it to fight off the cancer. He will have another MRI and see the neuro-oncologist in early April. In the meantime, we watch and wait and pray the Lord will give us the strength to remain faithful to His will, His word and His ways.

“And now, Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in You. – Psalm 39:7

I will give You thanks forever, because You have done [it,] And I will wait on Your name, for [it is] good, in the presence of Your godly ones. – Psalm 52:9

I do not know what the future holds, but by grace I do know the one who “is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.” -Colossians 1:19

For this I am GRATEFUL!